Change. It’s the very essence of life. Nature shows us every day. In the rise and fall of the sun and moon; In the tip of a plant poking through the dark soil; In the bloom of a flower opening.
If it’s such a natural part of life, why are people so adverse to it? When did we become so attached? Possessive? Clinging?
To our situations, our surroundings, to people, to stuff?
We spend hundreds of thousands of dollars every year on ‘stuff.’ Acquiring stuff, Storing stuff, Cleaning stuff, Moving stuff, And most sadly on lawyers to fight for stuff.
We need to work more hours to buy and maintain more stuff; then work more hours to buy bigger houses and storage areas to hold the stuff.
It isn’t just the physical stuff we collect. We add in our mental and emotional stuff, too. Baggage. Sometimes we wrap the stuff in the baggage and get really attached.
Our situations, our surroundings. We actively cling to them; staying in negative relationships far beyond when they are no longer healthy. Participating in activities that do not nourish us. Keeping people in our lives simply because they’ve always been there.
This attachment affects us. It drains us – our wallets, our energy, our health.
Yet we can’t live without some stuff and we need people, even the negative people serve a purpose in our lives.
So how to balance?
To take and keep only what we need in order to exist in the manner that satisfies us? Fulfills us? Nourishes us?
In order to be in balance, we need to know what we have.
An inventory, so to speak. Of the people and things in our lives. And we need to keep in touch with that inventory; assess it periodically. Spend more time with the stuff, activities, and people that nourish us.
Learn to recognize when they are no longer beneficial to us – or – when WE are no longer beneficial to THEM.
We need to develop the ability to move on, to purge.
Most often, we think of this in terms of our physical stuff – spring cleaning, trips to the donation centers. But we need this in our emotional and spiritual lives, as well.
If you can’t spend less time with that negative person, actively spend more time with a positive person. Work to change your attitude when you are going to be around that negative person.
Instead of going to an activity or visit with a sense of dread, proactively look for the possible positive outcomes. While engaged with that person, continue to look for areas of growth and energy on which you can focus. By doing so, you will actively attract more of that positive energy as well as radiate back positive energy.
What you focus on will expand. Choose to focus on the energy you want to give and receive.
In terms of the physical stuff, proactively look for ways to move that stuff with positive energy more than just dumping it at a donation center.
Did a friend just have a baby and you have baby items? Would that friend be open to receiving your stuff? Is it needed? Pass it on.
If you watch the news or read the papers, look for families that just had a tragedy. Do you have stuff that has become a physical and emotional burden but could be a blessing to them? Pass them on.
One of my favorite ways to unburden with love has been to ‘gift’ items to friends who commented that they enjoy them. Over tea one day, a friend commented that she adored a small sculpture I have had since college. Looking at the sculpture brought me joy and happy memories, but it no longer fit into my current physical surroundings. It always felt out of place to me. Like it no longer belonged.
A few weeks later I had occasion to express to her gratitude; I chose to do so in the form of the sculpture, dusted and cleaned then wrapped in beautiful paper. It now sits in a place of prominence in her home, looking – and feeling – quite happy to be there. I still have my memories of the item and how/why it was obtained, but I no longer have the item taking energy from my home; rather it gives energy in hers.
This week, I’d ask that you look for an item, or maybe a few items, that you can ‘move forward’ in their journey. Come back and comment how it felt to transition them.
In Light & Love